The mindfulness segment of DBT training consists of “What” and “How” skills,

What:

1. Observe
2. Describe
3. Participate

How:

1. Non-judgmentally
2. One-mindfully
3. Effectively

What Skills

Observe is sometimes a tough one for me. Just notice the experience without getting caught up in it. Have a “Teflon Mind” letting feelings and thoughts come into your mind and slip right back out. Push nothing away, cling to nothing. Notice everything with all of your senses. Be alert to every thought, feeling and action that comes into your mind.

Describe is just that. Put words on the experience. Say in your mind “I’m suddenly sad” or “a thought that ‘I can’t do this’ has just entered my mind” or “my stomach is queasy” Call a thought just a thought. A feeling just a feeling, don’t get caught in content.

Participate is jumping on in. Enter into experiences, getting completely involved. Act intuitively from wise mind. Actively practice your skills until they become a part of you. Practice changing harmful situations, changing your harmful reactions to situations, accepting yourself and situations just as they are. (boy that last one is a toughie!)

How Skills

Non-judgmentally means to see but don’t evaluate. Focus on what, not “good” or “bad”. Unstick your opinions from the facts. Accept each moment. Acknowledge the helpful but don’t judge it. Acknowledge the harmful but don’t judge it. When you find yourself judging, don’t judge your judging! Whew, that can be hard!

One-mindfully means to do whatever you are doing completely. If you are eating, eat. If you are worrying, worry. Do it with all of your attention. If other thoughts or actions distract you, let go of those distractions and go back to what you were doing, again and again. Concentrate your mind. If you find yourself doing two things at once, stop and go back to one thing at a time. Another tough one. How many of you drive the same route to and from work and barely remember the drive?

Effectively is to focus on what works. Do whatever you need to for each situation. Stay away from fair, unfair, right, wrong, should, should not. Play by the rules. Act as skillfully as you can in the situation you are in. Not the situation you wish you were in, not the one that is just, not the one that is more comfortable. Keep in mind your objectives in the situation and do what is needed to achieve them. Let go of vengeance, useless anger and righteousness.

That is it for the mindfulness section but it’s a lot! I’m getting better at this but I think it’ll take me years for it to just be second nature. Then start adding on all the other segments and it’s easy to feel pretty overwhelmed with it all. I am such a work in progress 😉

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, ‘Where have I gone wrong?’ Then a voice says to me, ‘This is going to take more than one night.’~ Charles M. Schulz